This is an update of the story I posted last year. Click here.
So, I ended that story by asking some questions, should I give her another chance? Should I go for it? Even though I was hurt and she cheated on me and what not. I know, you are thinking here goes another lamenting session. But come on, i am not crying about it (not anymore, lol).
So, I gave her a chance. It is not new, and It happened last year. Same time, when I wrote that previous article. If you read it, I know you are judging me maybe. But wait. Where was I? Yeah, so i gave her another chance. we decided to give it another shot. I tried being all lovey dovey again. But, you know, that you never forget something even if you decide to forgive? Do you feel me? Can you relate? Yeah? Every time I tried to talk normally with her, the pain would rush in to me. The pain that i have been “not so familiar with” until what had happened.
I had chosen to forgive her but I never realised that I am just another human being. It took me some time ( a week actually), to know that forgive and forget are two entirely different concept.
I have no personal grudge or hatred for her “anymore”. But I just could not let the guard down again. So i remained distant and could not break the barrier.
Now that I come to think of it. These things happen and it is not the end of life and neither is this the first time that this is ever happening to anyone. Time and again I am sure many people have had to endure this feeling (Sure feels ugly though). I am motivated to write this article because I got a comment on that old article today. It just reminded me of what had happened and also that I had not yet updated the scene to those few of you who have taken the time to read it.
It has been a long time (8 months to be precise). Few girls did come and go out of my life but I do not seem to be able to get attached with anyone. I have been contemplating the reason for it and I would be covering it in another article someday. For now, I seem to have a new problem in my life.
Being an Indian, from a traditional Tamil Brahmin family ( traditional -not me, only my family, its confusing, i know – don’t ask), my respectful parents have started to look for a bride to their most eligible bachelor son (that’s me, if i am not obvious). This has cracked open a whole new pandora box. Watch out for the next article. It’s to document how i drown in a bout between the “traditional values” and “my opinion”. Which crudely translates to what my parents think is good for me and what i feel I need for my life.
After a month or so into this bride selection marathon, I believe I will always be “single”. The late twenties are so overrated.