Guilty or Remorseless. Just choose one.

The mind decides to stay in control. Everything seems to be going good, and the determination has existed for so long. It seems like hours but, within minutes, the compulsion kicks in. The mind now plays trick over itself. Searching for any possible acceptable alabi. Anything which could justify the act, even after the decision to get over it. Sweat comes out, hands shaking, and the fist sized blood pump thumping faster. Just one more time, it is not going to make any difference. Just one last time, and then it will be for good. 

And this way, we give in to our addiction. Everybody is addicted to something or the other in this world. People are addicted to smoking, eating, drinking, sex, drugs, personal hobby, and what not. And the sad thing about this would be the point where we want to quit it, but, it’s the one last time which we crave for. It is always the one last time, that keeps it going. 

This puts the person in a characteral and behavioural dilemma. There exists guilt and yet the act continues. If this is the case, we can never overcome the addiction, break the habit. There should be place for only other thing, either be guilty or stop doing it, you cannot do both, it is simply too much work. 

Remember, your addictions do not define you, it’s your conviction that does. There are no bad people, there are just wise and unwise decisions. Is what you do, wise ? 

By A lost Soul at Sea

a passionate writer who also happens to be a mechanical engineer and a sailor

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