Well, it has been almost a month since my last status update. I hope you all are doing good. Well, I would demand your congratulations to me as I am in my final year of bachelor’s degree. Yes , Its the home stretch. It is just a week since the college reopened and already there are companies showing up for placements. Life is getting tight, and the pace is increasingly exponentially. Well, what is the thing in my mind now? What am I going to do? Also, where do I stand in fulfilling my autonomy?
My mind is dichotomized in the fact whether to satisfy myself with a job from B.tech degree or should I yearn for more. Getting a job with a pay of 50k per month would suffice the initial needs but I am still not sure whether it would hold the animal inside me from jumping off to learn more? But, the will is not the only thing that is sufficient for reaching the pinnacle. I feel like I was the epitome of confusion few days ago when all these thoughts were floating in my mind. Anyway, one needs to be opulent enough to get what he wants. Adding to that, the circumstances also plays a vital role. But, all these factors makes our intentions and ideas subject to fall under trivial considerations.
The placements process is keeping me busy from dusk till dawn. And I want to get placed in at least 2 firms. And I hope to bring out my potential in its ultimate form to attract the employers and persuade them to choose me. As we all would have experienced stage freight, I am experiencing something which would square with performance anxiety. And I guess this is common among people in similar situations. My level of philology is increasing so much that I guess I am, at times, too much of pedantic and a semanticist. I am hoping to get placed for now and then decide it later.
Here is my favourite part of life, where people try to micro manage your life and love to take credit for it. It mostly seems to my like an unintentional act of demagoguery. My parents want me to study for post graduate degree. And I tell you that it kills me when they tell, “You do not have to worry about money, we wil mortgage our house for you studies.”
As much as they would like to think that they were able to provide for me, the same would I like to think that I reduced the burden on them by not asking anymore of monetary funds. This appears like a paradox to me which cannot be solved as this is linked to the emotions between a son and his parents.
With love and respect, Adha.